The Mystery

December 23rd, just a little over a week ago, my fiance Zach and I were getting ready to snuggle up and watch a movie when somehow the conversation came up on what it means for wives to "submit" to their husbands as stated in Ephesians Chapter 5. I told him it meant to be obedient, but Zach was still a bit puzzled and to be honest I was too (though I wasn't necessarily going to admit it- I was anxious to hurry up and start snuggling in front of that movie with some hot chocolate.) I know the matters of God are always so much deeper than can be seen at first glance, and in that moment it became more apparent to me.
"Why don't we read it?" I asked. Within a few minutes Zach was lying on the couch fumbling through my Bible while I sat in the floor sipping a mug of hot chocolate. He wouldn't even let me show him where Ephesians was, let alone which verse it was we were looking for; he was on a mission.
When he finally found the chapter, he began reading out loud starting with verse 22. As Zach read to me, so many epiphanies (as I call them) began to hit me that I made several interruptions to verbally process what I was learning. I remembered eagerly crouching over these very same verses in a dimly lit study lounge of the dorm I live in at college, sobbing because I wanted so badly to understand what the Lord was saying and could not. Now, as my fiance was reading it was like I was hearing for the very first time.
"For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery-" Zach smiled and squinted at the passage before stating, "that right there explains a lot."
He was right. I know a couple girls, one my age and  the other my Grandmother's age, who are married and who both have told me upon my asking that they had no fears and no worries at all when preparing for marriage. Maybe I am just weird, but I certainly have! Now, I am not referring to "what if I gain weight and my dress doesn't fit" or "what if I cry and my make up runs everywhere." I am referring to the fact that I have no idea how to be a wife and have had a hard time understanding why God created marriage and filled me up with such a strong love for Zach if it's all about Him anyway. What is the point? (I realize I ask that a lot.)
Well, as Zach read to me God taught me some vital things about His big plan for the marriage between man and woman and the marriage between Christ and the Church.
God knows all and has all the answers (though He won't tell us what all of them are). He is like a person who has gone through the maze before, several times, and knows the right way to go to get to the other side. When He is trying to tell us, "Go this way. Trust me, I know," we can either follow Him or go the way we think will be best. It isn't logical to go a different way when the man who knows the right way is telling us where to go. When we don't obey Christ, we are acting as though we do not trust Him. When I do obey Christ (I realize I am not perfect and disobey probably more than I realize) it is out of love and trust that He is looking out for my greater good. As Zach's wife I am to submit to him. I am to obey, follow him, and trust him as I do the Lord, trusting he is leading me with wisdom in the Lord in a way that will bring me closer to Christ.
Although I don't have it all figured out from one epic Bible reading, my spirit is definitely more free just realizing man and woman with Christ and the Church is indeed a mystery. I know only a small portion of this mystery (I'm sure about the size of a crumb) in the months leading up to marriage , and I realize that however many years Zach and I have left of our lives will be filled with learning it more. Considering the way he helped teach me the verses in Ephesians 5, I'd say I am in good hands.

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Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the savior of the body.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her by the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing,  but that she should be holy and without blemish.

This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

~Ephesians 5: 1, 25-27, 32